Heart and Soul
by ratherbookish
Summary: An unexpected trip to a new town may finally bring romance to the Reverend Timothy...Thanks for reading! :) UPDATE: Lordy, it's been a while! Sorry friends! Life and such. Please review the new chapter and let me know your thoughts. xoxo
1. Chapter 1

The wedding was over. Dr Mike and Sully had left for their blissful honeymoon and all the guests had departed soon after, worn out from the festivities and leaving the Reverend to a yard full of the wedding wreckage. As he slowly walked around, picking up a ribbon here and a napkin there, his vision started to blur with tears, rare for this man of God. Timothy Johnson considered himself a fairly happy person. He had a lovely church that was filled every Sunday. The community of Colorado Springs loved him dearly and welcomed him into their lives every day. His health was tip-top and his soul was happy to be serving the Good Lord every day from sun up to sun down.

So why these tears? The Reverend was shocked to feel them slipping down his face, not because there wasn't an aching in his heart -there was- but because he never, ever allowed himself such luxuries as self-pity and sorrow. He was angry with himself for letting the mask slip. And for entertaining such selfish thoughts as those which were inhabiting his mind of late. He looked up at the rails which had taken away the newlyweds. Sully and Dr Mike. Michaela. He had proposed to her. And he had meant it, too. She was beautiful, gorgeous! And what a heart she had! Bigger than the Colorado sky. But she had turned him down and now he was alone again with only the love of the Lord to comfort him. When had that stopped being enough? When had he started desiring more? God was so good to him and Timothy loved Him with all of his being…but maybe the heart needed love that the soul couldn't understand.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

That night Timothy knelt by his bed and prayed a new kind of prayer. "Dear Lord I don't understand these feelings. Are they caused by the marriage of Dr Mike? Am I feeling angry and jealous? Or am I just lonely and in need of a friend? God please help me to understand my emotions so as to better serve you… and if they are occurring to lead me to a new road, Lord help me to do your will. Amen." As he slipped into bed a calming peace came over him like a gentle breeze. The Reverend was just as confused as he was before but now he felt at ease. Whatever was coming, he just needed to keep his heart open. God's will be done.

-3 months later-

"Reverend! Reverend! Wake up!" Timothy was yanked awake from a lovely dream he'd been having about being back home, with his family. "Reverend I need your help!" It was Michaela and she was visibly upset. Timothy jumped out of bed and tried to sort out the jumble of her words. Her father's friend, Walter, in Wyoming, he was very sick, Sully was away and she needed someone to go with her, might be good to have a priest nearby. Timothy quickly agreed to go and sent her to wait in the wagon. He hastily pack a bag, wondering if this was the adventure he had felt impending. It wasn't going to be easy though, traveling with Dr Mike. He still felt a little quiver in his heart whenever she was near him. Divine help was needed, so dropping to his knees he sent up a prayer of supplication and then ran out to join the doctor in the wagon.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

They arrived at the station just in time to catch the early train and had their pick of the carriages, being some of the few who were up that early. Timothy studied Michaela's face as he packed their bags into the compartments above their seats. She looked so troubled and almost on the verge of tears. He contemplated leaving her alone for a bit, with the excuse of going to find some coffee but she looked so distraught. He sat down beside her, took her hand, and offered a sympathetic smile. She gratefully returned the smile and squeezed his hand.

"Thank you Reverend. I'm glad you are coming with me; this is going to be difficult in many ways so it will be a comfort to have you by my side. I guess I ought to explain more about this situation to you." He stopped her, "It can wait Dr Mike. Why don't you sleep for a bit?" But she insisted she wasn't tired and that talking would be better than dwelling on her thoughts. "Walter Davis is a dear family friend," she explained, "He and my father attended medical school together and they were extremely close, almost brothers really. In fact he moved his family from Wyoming to Boston so they could be in practice together. Our families grew up together. After Daddy passed on, Walter moved back to Wyoming. He couldn't bear to see anything that reminded him of my father. Horace brought me a telegram this morning from Mrs. Davis saying that there is a bad tumor growing in her husband's stomach. No doctors are willing to take the risk of trying to remove it. It sounds bad and I'm not sure if I'll even be able to help. And to make matters worse, the family is deeply religious and Walter is asking for a priest but there are none in the immediate area. Most of Wyoming is Protestant. Walter has had heated debates with most of the nearby preachers and none will give him last rights." She paused, her face pained. "I'm afraid I never did ask you if you would be comfortable with this. I just assumed, knowing your kind nature, that it wouldn't be a problem…" Timothy firmly assured her that she needn't worry about that. Her face relaxed into a smile, she squeezed his hand again and then turned towards the window to gaze at the passing countryside.

Timothy took this opportunity to gauge his present emotions. Holding Michaela's hand and being alone with her previously would have made his stomach flop. He realized, with relief, that he wasn't having those nervous feelings. Her hand did feel comfortable is his though, and he enjoyed the sensation. He didn't get the opportunity for much human contact, other than shaking hands and occasionally being slapped on the back by one of the men. It occurred to him though that Sully would probably chop his head off if he saw the Reverend holding hands with his wife, even in the most innocent manner. He let go and murmured an excuse of going to look for that coffee now and stretching his legs. Now that he was sure of himself, Timothy felt just a bit excited about traveling to a new place and meeting new people. Who knew what was waiting in Wyoming?


	4. Chapter 4

~Greetings folks! Just wanted to apologize for the long time it's taking me to produce such short chapters…just one more month left of the semester and work is piling up! Thank you for reading though and I do hope you enjoy it!

Chapter 4

They arrived at the house late in the evening. A girl opened the door and looked first at Timothy, a questioning and wary expression on her face. "Can I help you, sir?" But then Dr Mike stepped up from behind him and the girl lit up with shock and happy surprise. "Mike?! Mother said she wrote you but that was only last week!" They stood hugging and chattering for a few minutes before the girl with a start realized they were still in the doorway. 'Oh please do come in, I'm so sorry I have entirely forgotten my manners." She ushered them into the sitting room where there were comfortable chairs and a large, cheerful fire. Dr Mike asked about Walter and the girl's smile disappeared. "Daddy's been in much pain today and just fell asleep. We should probably let him rest awhile. Let me get you warmed up first and then we'll go see him." She ran to the kitchen and the guests sat in two of the fluffy chairs. Dr Mike stared at the retreating figure and then turned to Timothy. "I'm so sorry Reverend, I was so caught up in surprise that I didn't even introduce you. That was one of Walter's children, Jessica. She was one of my dearest friends while growing up, though there's a decade between us. I haven't seen her or any of the family since I left for medical school." The girl appeared back at the door, holding a tray of teacups, and hearing the last of their conversation. "I surely hope you haven't been telling your friend about all the trouble we were growing up, Mike," she said with the twinkle back in her eyes. She set down the tray and then and held out her hand while Michaela introduced them. Her eyes flew wide when she heard his title and apologized profusely for not realizing. Timothy couldn't help smiling at her awkwardness but then was shocked when she dipped down and kissed his hand. He turned to Michaela with a questioning look. When Jessica had turned away to pour the tea, Dr Mike whispered to him, "Walter Davis has raised his children with his deep respect for the clergy. You can expect that from all of them here." Just then another woman appeared in the doorway, an older version of the girl, with the same fiery copper hair, and holding a crying baby. Michaela jumped up to greet her and introduce the Reverend. Mrs. Davis passed the baby to Jessica, who quickly calmed the child and left the room. "Rev Johnson I presume?" She took his hand in both of hers. "It's an honor, sir. I simply cannot thank you enough for being here with us in this difficult time. I know that we all will be comforted by your presence among us! The children are all abed now, but for Jessica and the baby. I cannot wait for them to meet you!" They sat by the fire and Mrs Davis showed Timothy a picture of the whole family. He was shocked to see twelve fine looking children surrounding their parents. "You have a beautiful family Mrs Davis." he remarked, honestly. "Oh goodness, Reverend, please do call me Mary. "Mrs Davis" sounds so old!" He laughed, liking the genial woman already, and agreeing to her request. They chatted about the children until Jessica popped her head in to tell them that Walter was awake.

The bedroom was a small one, but well lit with a warm crackling fire and furnished plainly and comfortably. On the big, four posted bed lie a man who tried to sit up when they entered. Dr Mike rushed over to him and made him lie back down. She introduced Timothy to her old friend and Walter, his green eyes bright with emotion in his pallid face, expressed his profound thanks for the Reverend's presence. It was apparent though that the man was not up for conversation so Mrs. Davis and Timothy left the room and Michaela examined her new patient. "Reverend, why don't I show you to your room now?" Mrs. Davis inquired, "It is rather late." Timothy protested but she assured him that there was nothing more that he could do at the moment and he would be wakened if he was needed during the night. Jessica appeared at the top of the stairs just then with his and Dr Mike's luggage. "Mum, I can get the Reverend settled in, you go back to Daddy now and tell Mike she can stay in Jenn and Anna's room with me." Her mother gratefully kissed her cheek and then left them to gather the luggage and walk down the hall. Timothy wondered where he would be sleeping, the Davis' house was a fair size but with so many children they mustn't have much extra room. Jessica read his thoughts and said with a smile, "Oh don't worry sir, I won't make you stay with the rowdy boys. You can stay in my room. It's rather smallish but it's the most quiet." Timothy disagreed wholeheartedly, "Miss Davis, I wouldn't mind at all sharing a room with your brothers. I really can't take your room." "Reverend" she countered, "respectfully I must tell you that debate with me is pointless. My mother may have the sweetness and patience of a lamb but my father is as obstinate as an ox…and I take after him." They held each other's stubborn gaze for a moment before the girl arched a brow and Timothy finally gave up with a laugh. She showed him to the room and quickly gathered some things before bidding him goodnight. Right before she walked out the door though Jessica paused and turning to him, she smiled with brimming eyes, "Reverend, I….just…thank you so much for coming here!" And with that she scurried out of the room.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

In the morning as Timothy dressed, he took some time to look around the quaint little room he was staying in. It had been rather dark the night before but now in the morning sunlight he could see its features. It was plain but comfortable, giving the same warm feeling that the rest of the house and its occupants gave. There were some interesting small drawings and paintings covering two of the walls top to bottom and the other two were likewise covered, but by large bookcases, filled to brimming. Timothy found many of the favourite novels he had enjoyed in his youth and made a mental note to ask Miss Davis if he could borrow them.

The dining room wasn't difficult to find, he simply followed the loud hum of chatter and clinking dishes. Mrs Davis saw him first and quickly placed him beside her at the large table, filling his plate and asking how he had slept. "I was quite comfortable Mrs Davis, thank you. How is Dr Davis this morning?" "No better in body but his spirit rested easy last night now that you and Michaela are here. She is with him now, I will take you to them once you've eaten" Once everyone was just finishing up, the woman stood and clapped her hands, earning almost immediate silence from her brood. "Children I would like you to welcome Reverend Johnson to our house. He is to stay with us awhile to care for father and I want every one of you to do your part in making him feel at home." A few of the smaller children just stared at him but he was relieved to see many shy smiles and a few waves in his direction. Turning to him once more, Mrs Davis explained, "My husband and I have twelve children but not all are here at the moment, Reverend. My three oldest girls are at college right now, but they will be home this evening for the weekends time. Jessica –whom you met last light- is out running errands with the two youngest and here you see the rest." Jessica appeared then and she and the older children cleared the table, one bringing Mrs Davis a cup of coffee for their father and another for Timothy. When the mess was cleared away, they all came to him and introduced themselves with a handshake before grabbing their lunch bags and running off to school.

Walter and Michaela were chatting when Timothy stepped into the room. They waved him over and he sat on the edge of the bed. Walter asked Michaela to repeat what she had been telling him. "Walter has a stomach tumor," she said, "it is in a very precarious position; I can see why the other doctors chose not to even try and remove it." Walter reached for her hand. "The Lord has showed me that it is not my time to go just yet though. I have decided that if Dr Mike will attempt the surgery, I am willing to put myself into her hands. If you Reverend Johnson will hear my confession, we shall attempt the surgery tonight." Dr Mike left the room and Walter began his confession. They had a lengthy talk about faith and Timothy found he had a lot in common with the humble and zealous man. He tried to stay away from any topics they might began to disagree upon, so as to not provoke debate but he could tell the man wanted to test Timothy's metal. They delved into many topics and hardly noticed the passing hours until Jessica brought up a tray of lunch for them. Her interruptance only broke the conversation for a moment. Dr Davis dove right back in. Timothy saw a beaming smile on the daughter's face and she mouthed a silent 'thank you' to which he smiled in response. He spent the rest of the afternoon with the man preparing him for that evening's ordeal.

The eldest girls arrived home right before supper. They immediately ran to their father's room, finally ending the men's talk with their hugs and chatter. They were introduced to Timothy and he thought to himself that the Davis parents were surely blessed. The girls were stunning. The eldest, Elizabeth at 23 had her mother's angelic disposition, which matched well with her curly blond hair and blue eyes. She was studying nursing at university. Annabelle and Jennifer were twins of 20, tall and graceful, with chestnut hair. They were both studying music, and only distinguishable by their different eye colour. Annabelle had blue eyes and Jennifer, brown.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Supper was a quiet affair that evening. The children had all been informed of the surgery taking place that night and their fear was clearly shown on their faces. The boys didn't push or shove, and there was no more girlish chatter from their sisters. Just the sound of clinking china and the occasional sigh. When the table had been cleared, Mrs Davis suggested they all go to father's room to pray a rosary together. Timothy watched while all the older children took the hands of their younger siblings or picked them up to carry them up the stairway. Annabelle took his arm and asked him to join them. It occurred to him then that he was growing really very fond of this family.

The prayers were beautiful, if repetitive, and Timothy caught on quickly to the ones he didn't know. As the Davis family lifted their prayers to the Lord, the anxious and worried looks left their faces and peace filled the room. When they were finished, each child kissed their father and left the room. Only Mrs Davis, Michaela, Elizabeth, and Timothy remained. They helped Dr Mike prepare the patient. Mrs Davis and Elizabeth were used to the goriness that accompanied surgeries but the Reverend found himself growing sick even just standing over the man's head with chloroform. When he started turning a deep shade of green, Mrs Davis suggested he step out for a bit and he did not argue. The sound of music drew him downstairs to the sitting room. There the children were all gathered round the piano and in the chairs by the fire. Annabelle was playing a hymn and Jennifer was softly singing, joined by a few of the children. One of the older boys, Peter, saw him and beckoned him in, asking if it was over already. Jessica walked in them with a tray of hot drinks and 11 anxious faces looked to him for news. He told them it had been a normal procedure so far and he didn't sense any problems. A moment of quiet and sighs followed his words and then Annabelle began playing again. They sat for the next 3 hours, sending someone up every now and again to check on the progress. When 10 o clock hit, the young children were all sent to bed and the older ones went to get them settled. Timothy went to Dr Davis's room to see if he could help again. He was appalled at the amount of blood everywhere, it made him queasy again but he decided he had to be brave. Dr Mike was just beginning to stitch up the gaping hole in the man's belly. They looked up when he entered and Michaela gave him a tense smile. She looked exhausted. "I got it" she said, "the surgery was successful. Now we can only wait. " She shared a brief smile with the other women and then bent again to her task. They worked together to clean up the mess and then Timothy volunteered to sit with the unconscious man for the rest of the night so that the women could get some rest. Dr Mike and Elizabeth gratefully agreed but Mrs Davis refused to leave her husband's side. Dr Mike tried to persuade her, "I wouldn't leave unless I was sure he'd be alright." But she refused. When the others had left, she sat staring at her husband's face and holding on to his hand as if she could by force keep him in this world. "Reverend," she said, never breaking her gaze on my man she loved, "could you perhaps read to us a little from the Bible?" Timothy picked up the copy that lay on the bedside table and retired to a chair in the back of the room. He began with the Psalms, reciting in a quiet and lulling voice that carried on throughout the night.

A little before three in the morning Jessica came in to find the patient and both his watchers sleeping soundly. She woke her mother and the Reverend and sent them to bed, promising to wake them if there was any change. Dr Walter made no movements or sounds in his sleep. He looked so peaceful that his daughter had to keep checking to be sure he was breathing. "Well Daddy you've gotten this far so I gotta believe the good Lord still needs you here on earth and I'm grateful for that. The clock just struck three so why don't we pray the Divine Mercy now?" She pulled a rosary from her pocket and took her father's hand.

The next day was quiet, as had been the evening before. Dr Davis had still not yet awoken. The day was rainy and dreary. Everyone was tired and groggy, and life felt like a monotonous cycle checking on the patient every couple of minutes. Those who weren't sitting with the man stayed together in the sitting room with no talking or laughter, just hugs, tears and sighs. The oldest girls tried to rouse some hope with music but no one felt like singing. Finally Jessica seemed to get an idea. "Oh Reverend, did Daddy tell you about the time we put bath salts in his sugar jar and consequently filled the dining room with bubbles when he "sweetened" his coffee?" Timothy said no he hadn't so she asked one of the boys to share the tale. It was indeed rather funny and gained a few giggles and smiles. That did the trick, and soon all the children were sharing funny memories and laughing together. They sat thusly till about 4 in the evening when Dr Mike burst into the room with a happy smile saying that their father was awake. She tried to calm the stampede but that was an impossible task. Timothy felt his heart leap at the laughter he heard when he finally entered the room, at the back of the mob. The patient was sitting up, surrounded by happy faces and smiling, in a tired way. Dr Mike caught Timothy's eye and motioned for them to leave the family in private. They went to the kitchen and got some coffee, taking it to the sitting room to be near the warm fire there. Timothy congratulated her on the successful surgery. She warned that Walter still had to watched closely for signs of infection but it really did seem a miracle that everything was going so well. "It must be this family" he replied, "they really are special."

That night Timothy couldn't sleep. Partly because of the treacherous thunderstorm shaking the house and partly because of his worry for Dr Walter. He got up and decided to check on the patient. He opened the door and found the man being watched over by his wife and eldest daughter. It was apparent that he had interrupted a private conversation though so after he said a quick prayer over the sleeping man, he left. As he tiptoed down the hall he heard voices and saw a light coming from one of the rooms. Thinking it might be one of the smaller children scared by the storm, he knocked on the door. It was opened by one of the tiny girls, Sarah he thought her name was, who immediately after seeing it was him, ran back to where she had been sitting. All the young children appeared to be piled on one bed and from the pile came a laughing voice welcoming him in. The voice wriggled up from the tiny arms and legs and soon became the bemused face of Jessica. "See children, even Reverends are scared by thunderstorms." She winked at him and invited him to take the rocking chair by the bed. "We're all a bit frightened of the storm tonight so I thought it was an excellent time to catch up on our storytelling. Do you know any good lullabies or stories, Reverend?" Timothy felt a pang at her words, thinking of Louise and how their engagement was broken. "I'm sorry, I'm not very good at stories," he said. But Jessica's gentle smile encouraged him and he decided to share one of the tales from his grandmother. The children thoroughly enjoyed it and little Sarah, after being bumped off the bed had even climbed up onto his lap.

When the story was over, the storm had subsided and most of the children were asleep so Timothy and Jessica carried them to their beds. When the last one had been tucked in, Timothy and their sister waited in the hall for a minute, listening for any wakers. All was quiet. Jessica laughed at the look of overwhelm on the preachers face. "Well how are you enjoying our nut house?" she asked. He laughed right back and said he liked it very much but they surely were never idle. She agreed that the pace didn't often let up but she enjoyed it. Timothy inquired then about the books in her room and she eagerly invited him to borrow any that he wanted. When he asked for suggestions, she launched into a long list of her favorites, before stopping and apologizing with embarrassment. "Reading is my passion and I often get a bit carried away. Daddy got me started when I was very young" She explained. He assured her there was no need for an apology; he shared her love of books and didn't often get to talk about them. They smiled. "Well I had better get to bed now. Your older sisters are taking me riding tomorrow and I feel I probably will need much energy!" They laughed and he reached out to shake her hand goodnight and nearly jumped at the zap of electric shock when their hands met. "That'll be the Holy Spirit saying it's high time for bed!" she joked. But the sparkle in her green eyes made Timothy hold her gaze and her hand for just a bit longer before wishing her goodnight and retiring to his room. He laughed to himself as he recalled her unabashed giggling at his awkwardness when her sister had climbed up on his lap and the fire that lit her eyes when she spoke of her favourite books. There was no denying that he found her rather charming. He wondered what she thought of him. Dr Mike had joked that if he was wanting a wife, there was no better place to take his pick. Sir Walter's eldest daughters were all strikingly beautiful and kind. But this one, she was so young! He thought her maybe 18 or 19, really hardly more than a child. No, he decided he needed to try to spend some more time with the other girls, as busy as they were. They would be home for the week though, on break from the university. Well, he thought to himself, the ride tomorrow would give them ample time to get better acquainted.


	7. Chapter 7

Timothy awoke to the gentle warm sunlight on his face. Downstairs someone, probably Annabelle or Jennifer, was playing the piano and singing softly. He could hear the pitter-patter of little feet (and bigger feet) trying to quietly maneuver the halls without waking the patient and the late sleepers. He laid there for a few minutes longer, just soaking in the feeling that this family was giving him. The whole household was as warm and comforting as the sunlight on his face.

His mind flitted back to the congregation back home. His congregation. His home. There was a pang of homesickness, but then he remembered that he was to get a tour of the countryside from the Davis girls this morning. Timothy quickly dressed and joined the family for breakfast. He found them all in high spirits. Walter was improving wonderfully and the girls were home so the whole family was together again. After the meal, Timothy followed Elizabeth upstairs to take Dr. Davis a cup of coffee and check on him. As they approached the room, they heard a whispered argument going on. Elizabeth motioned for them to enter the room anyway. As they entered, Jessica, pacing beside her father's bed, shot her sister an exasperated look and turned away to the window. Elizabeth tended to her father and then left, calling Jessica to follow her. Dr. Davis watched them go, with tired but bemused eyes and Timothy wondered if he should ask what was wrong, but the older man spoke up first. He asked if Timothy was comfortable and so the pastor told him about the gracious hospitality and wonderful laughs he'd enjoyed from the family. This brought a laugh from the doctor and he said he was glad. They prayed together and talked of some things that were in the papers, but Timothy could tell that something was bothering the other man. Finally, he asked him outright if something was on his mind. Dr. Davis was quiet for a moment. It was obvious he wasn't one to bare his emotions easily or speak of his troubles. But Timothy had such a patient and understanding look so he decided to tell him. "It's my daughter," he said, "Jessica." Apparently the girl had a hankering to leave the country to be a missionary. She knew that her parents couldn't afford to send her to college as her three sisters had gone. She wanted to teach, badly. But she also wanted to serve the Lord. Her parents were not so keen on sending her far away from home though and that was the debate. Timothy understood the man's feelings. He had no children of his own but he could only imagine being in the shoes of a father whose child desired a life that might be dangerous. He asked Dr Davis if he would like him to speak to her. The tired eyes lit with a bit of hope, "Would you?" Timothy promised he would, that night when he got back from his afternoon with the other daughters. "Thank you, my friend. It means the world to me." Timothy wondered at the feeling of gratitude that welled in him a being given the opportunity to help this family. They are certainly something special, he thought. That must be it.

That afternoon, Elizabeth, Annabelle and Jennifer took Timothy on the promised tour of the countryside. The weather was warm and sunny, a perfect fresh spring day, so some of the younger children were joining them. The Reverend was surprised to see that they all knew how to ride, and well, all down to little 6 year old Sarah who had her own little pony. They rode for an hour and then stopped in a pretty meadow for a picnic lunch. After eating, the children started a game of tag. Timothy and Elizabeth declined their offer to join the game and instead sat on the picnic blanket and talked. Elizabeth told him about school and her friends and wanting to join the family practice and Timothy told her stories of his home and the people there. It was altogether most enjoyable. Elizabeth was very pretty, and she blushed every time she caught him staring too long. She had such a gentle and sweet demeanor, except in looks she was just exactly like her mother. Timothy really enjoyed their time together and even felt a twinge of disappointment when Jennifer and Annabelle quit the game and joined them. It was a very pleasant afternoon and they would've stayed longer but clouds started to fill the skies so the group had to pack up and head home. On the way back, Timothy remembered his promise to Dr Davis and asked the older girls what they knew about Jessica's plans. Annabelle, the quietest of them, was closest to her sister and told the Reverend some of the reasons why her sister wanted so badly to go. What she told him only troubled Timothy more. This was definitely a difficult situation that he had stepped into the middle of, but he was still determined to help.


	8. Chapter 8

When the group arrived back at the house, bedraggled and worn out, the older children all took a younger one under their wing to wash up and put to bed for a nap. Timothy inquired after Jessica, thinking this might be a good time to talk with her, but not being able to find her, he retired to his room to wash up and rest. Soon the house was quiet, but for the storm which was now raging outdoors. The Reverend was just browsing for a book to read when there came a gentle tap at his door. He opened it to find Jessica, looking very damp and put out with a pleading look on her wet face. He ushered her in, careful to leave the door open a bit- for propriety's sake- and retrieved a large towel from the bathroom. She offered a small smile of thanks and sunk in a heap to the floor, drying off her face and hair which was still dripping.

Timothy watched her, wondering if he should maybe put off his questions for another time. She must have sensed his uneasiness, because she said to him, without looking up or pausing her drying, "Please do sit down and stop worrying, I'm quite alright." He chuckled at this and she finally looked up at him, this time with a genuine, if not amused smile on her face. He sat in the big, worn chair by the window a few feet away from her and when he had sat she began to speak, the words at first halting but then tumbling faster and faster. "I...I heard that father told you...about what I want to do. You probably think I'm a selfish child. I know I am. But I AM glad he asked you to speak with me because, for all my foolishness, I think you understand me and might understand why I feel that I must go through with this." This statement and the girl's obvious trust in him touched Timothy's heart and he vowed to himself to do all he could to help her. When she looked at him, he nodded at her to continue and she turned her gaze back to the floor before she began again to speak.

"I can't pretend to understand it really, this desire in my heart. It's always been there as long as I can remember. The desire to serve, to help people...people who have nothing. I want to live where they live and experience true poverty. I couldn't pretend to understand their pain unless I experienced it myself. It isn't that I long for suffering. That sounds too morbid. It is more that I desire simplicity. A life where black and white are clearly distinguishable. I want to be in a place where the hand of God can be seen everywhere and not clouded by the dust of machinery and "progress." I want to help people to find Jesus and teach them how to worship Him….is….is any of this making sense?"

During this monologue, the girl had stood up and paced the room, eventually coming to the one window and facing out of it. But now she turned towards the Reverend whose head was bent and chin rested in his hand. He was thinking, thinking hard. Praying harder. How to guide this young woman and tell her what she needed to hear? But she must have misinterpreted his silence because she apologized for her "ranting" and flew to exit the room. Timothy stood quickly, knocking over the chair , and grabbed her arm beckoning her back. "No no! I'm sorry, forgive me! I was just thinking, you said so much and I was praying for help, it wasn't you!" The girl searched his face for truth, her cheeks blushing scarlet with embarrassment. But he squeezed her hand and she came back into the room and sat in the chair which he righted. He then to her great surprise, and his own, sat on the floor at her feet and taking her hand, pressed it and said "You spoke no foolishness, my friend, I assure you. I was simply taken aback by your words. I do understand you, and I'm so glad you trust me enough to share your heart as you do. I too felt the desire that you are experiencing, and that is why you see me here now as a man of God. Following that desire was the greatest decision I ever have made. However, I cannot promise you that the road to fulfilling it, and living it, will be easy. Especially in your case.

"My family…" she whispered. "Yes. It will mean giving them up, at least in part." Silent tears began to roll down the girl's face and Timothy just sat there, holding her small hand and praying for divine help for her struggling soul.

After a little while, the tears stopped, and he handed her a handkerchief. "Thank you." she said, and he saw in her eyes that she was grateful for more that just the piece of cloth. A glance at the clock made her fly up once again, nearly as abruptly as she had before. "Oh I AM sorry, it's so late and you're to meet the train early tomorrow, are you not?" "It's quite alright," he assured her, "I'm not much of a long sleeper anyhow, but you should be abed before the children start looking for you." They shared a smile and he walked with her to the door. "Will you be alright?" he asked. "I think so," she replied. "Might I write to you though...for support? I think I'm going to speak to mother and father tomorrow." She looked so imploringly that he couldn't have refused even if he'd wished to. "Of course." She smiled with a tremendous sigh of relief and pulled him into a hug before flitting off down the hall towards the source of tiny, whispering voices.

As he closed the door behind her, he felt an emptiness and chill,as if the fire has gone out. She was certainly something, that girl. She got to him, and hit a part of his heart he hadn't dusted off in a while. She made him remember his passion and youth. There was something else about her though. When she left, he felt just so...empty. With a start, the thought hit him full force. It was enough to made him laugh out loud but immediately sober up and stare stupidly into the fire. He was in love. He was absolutely in love. Not with the eldest girl who was graceful and intelligent, nor with one of her willowy and musical sisters. No, he went and fell for the little, fiery one who liked books and wanted to risk her neck in some far-off land. He sat down next to the fire and stared into it, till he realized that the sun was coming up and that meant he was soon to leave...


End file.
